Exercise Exorcise

With another age click coming right around the corner, I am noticing it is not pretty. Parts hurt where last week they did not. Energy can lag depending on the day. A few weeks ago, I met my friend and we talked about the aging thing. I told her that I had recorded some measurements and climbed on that scale. She showed the most compassionate look, placed her hand on mine and said, “I’m sorry!”  It was just what I needed to hear, Compassion.

With wanting to move in another direction, I needed to make some new decisions, those “exorcisms” that have become habits, offering comfort, as I feel the downhill slide.

When we are asked or urged to “lose weight,” lose or give up eating our comfort foods (ice cream, Twinkies, chips, etc.), smoking, excessive drinking, there is grief involved. Even though we know it is probably better for us to let go of those things, each thing served us to some degree. The extra weight is giving us the sense of feeling safer, that insulation from hurts and trauma. Eating that creamy bowl of ice cream with hot fudge sauce goes down so well, like a big hug. Eventually for me, it catches up.

Over the years, I have continued to adjust my eating, adding more vegetables and fruits as a replacement for the other things. Finding something that is not an exact equivalent yet will work can be tricky until we get used to the new. (TIP: After peeling a banana, I cut it up and put the pieces in the freezer. When frozen, I will put my coconut milk in the blender then drop the frozen banana chunks [try strawberries, chucks of mango, etc.] to make a smoothie/milk shake. Satisfying and yum!)

Whatever we “lose,” let go of, there is the element of grief. That sadness. When I am coming to terms about letting go of chocolate, cheddar, chicken and sugar, I can feel that tug of pulling it back into my food rotation. As my friend and I talked, that stuff sends out that Siren song to lure us back. Just one bite… Last night, that chocolate was yelling at me. I drank water and went to bed. It is not that I don’t have will power, it is that I struggle with won’t power.

My knees are better. Another friend said since I was minimizing sugar, that is likely the reason. Sugar is considered an inflammatory substance.

There is a gym close to my house that I go to. Notice “close to” is the operative work. Now regardless of the weather, my excuses are minimized and the bathroom is much closer. Once a week, I meet my friend and we go together. She wishes I lived closer to help her get in the groove. The excuses I can come up with are melting. Taking the small steps can make bigger changes and it can become easier.

Grieving the old losses can aid in moving into the replacements and the new stuff and a better way of living. My motivation? Going on a trip next year that requires a lot of walking. Since I like to see the history tours, I will need to get my body agreeing with me to do that. So off I go…